I find myself always looking for a reason to quit.

Almost as soon as I start, I am trying to get out of it again. Why? Do I get bored or am I afraid?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"So, what's the diagnosis, doctor?"

"It's deeper down than we feared...malignant possibly. I thought it might be a case of Say Yes syndrome, it was textbook really. But the lab tests show the truth; You are content with a life that is too small for you, but like a fully developed insect in a cocoon, it's beginning to shatter around you. You don't want to increase your responsibility because you fear increasing the magnitude of failure. This makes sense of course, because clearly, there was an amount of failure which you could handle, and there was an amount of control in your own life and the lives of others and events of the world that you did have."

"Well, what can I do? What's the treatment plan?"

"I could tell you to accept the fact that you are not in control of the universe, just you. Do your best and keep moving forward in life. However, knowing that you will just use that to rationalize your way out of actually doing anything at all and just try to make your self feel better saying you are working through a process, I'm simply going to say suck it up. Welcome to Life."